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Gran Fondo NJ: Medio Fondo Recap part 2

If you missed part 1 of my GFNJ Medio review, check it out.

We pick up our adventure in the depths of Sunday morning, in pitch darkness.

Sunday (day of GFNJ)

When the alarm goes off at 4AM, it's never a pleasant thing.  Although I'm typically up at 5AM daily, I for some reason had a rough time getting to sleep Saturday evening, leaving me with only about 4 hours of sleep for GFNJ.  Looking back at things, this may be one of the issues I had during the day.  I stumbled through the shower, hoping to give myself some semblance of humanity at those wee hours of the morning, and stumbled into the kitchen to fire up the coffee maker.

Now, a lot of people will tell you that you should avoid eating prior to a big ride.  I tend to disagree to an extent: if the ride is an hour away or less, go with something extremely light (a Bulletproof coffee works well for me.)  If you have 3 hours to go until start, go with your normal breakfast routine: something clean,  a nice mix of protein, fat and carbs.  In this case rice, eggs, ham and a small amount of cheese hit the nail right on the head.

We slithered into our kits, loaded up the bikes and headed off to Morristown (about 30 minutes drive) amid an absolutely empty highway.  Sneaking into the Headquarters Plaza garage via the Spring Street entrance allowed us to miss the backed up traffic on Speedwell ave, which was a big plus on one hand and a big negative on the other.  We geared up, packed our pockets, saddled up and wandered towards the start/finish area, arriving before they had even set up the start/finish line.

GFNJ Start lineIt was about 6:00 AM and it was about 58 degrees.

We had decided to skip jackets, arm warmers or leg warmers since we would only be riding in the cool morning weather for a short amount of time, and this may have been another issue.  We were forced to stand around for about an hour, sucking down complimentary coffee, trying to stay warm and keeping the muscles loose and supple.  As we got closer to roll out, we lined up near the front of the 16 MPH group, hoping to get a nice, easy warmup without having the temptation to chase the fast guys.

That was probably the biggest mistake of the day.

The mass start was uneventful, if not a little nervous.  I had no problem riding elbow to elbow with 1800 other people, but there were plenty of folks who were really freaked out by it.  Compounding that problem were the narrow roads out of Morristown and the slick roads full of debris from yesterday's storm.  We passed a nasty looking crash at mile 3 on a downhill curve (after the fact we found out the rider had a broken collarbone and some road rash, but was otherwise ok.)  The real problem began to manifest itself as we hit the rolling hills on the roads towards Gladstone and the first timed climb.

I realized that people were grossly overestimating their speed on hilly terrain.  We were stuck behind untoward numbers of people who SHOULD have been riding in the 14 mph category or lower, but were somehow ahead of us.  This means we had to spend a LOT of energy slowing down behind riders, accelerating past them, slowing down, accelerating, repeat infinate times.

Tip #5: Conserve your energy for those really tough efforts.  If you burn too many matches too early, you're destined for a bad day.

The first rest stopI knew this, but there was little that we could do about it.  We finished the first hour at about 12 miles per hour, which was far afield the 16.5 MPH goal speed that I had set for my time.  When things opened up on Lake Road, Glen and I dropped the hammer and started the afterburners firing: we picked up about 2 MPH average over the next 10 miles heading into the first timed climb, and pulled into the first rest stop to grab a bit of food and to drain off the morning's coffee.

I'd laid out the climb for Glen a couple times before the ride: rollers at the base of the climb, steep kicker, false flat, another kick, extended double digit gradient, false flat, short descent, final kick to the line.  He took off on the rollers at the base of the climb, and I let him go, settling into a comfortable pace and prepping myself for the coming steeps.  I caught him halfway up the first false flat, and we worked together through most of the extended steep section, with him reining it in near the top.  I went for the kill, accelerating through the top and then stopping to wait for the rest of the group.  We chatted a bit with other riders (hearing the comment of the day: “Well THAT was fuckin' humbling!”) and cheered on everyone who passed.  (After the fact, we learned that Gerald managed a PR on the first climb, which was excellent improvement from his previous attempt.  My wife managed a QOM and PR on that climb, which was superb.  I managed a PR, shaving off a minute and a quarter.)

When we saddled up again a couple minutes later, I started to feel twinges in my calves.  I knew that I had burned a lot of energy early on and that I was probably in trouble at this point, but I pushed on through Califon, amazing ice cream sandwiches from BEX Kitchen and towards the second climb.  I struck out early, setting a solid pace through the rolling climbing on the first half, with Glen doing the pace setting on the 1 mile long false flat.  I kicked hard at the 200 meter, quickly steepening pitch at the end of the climb, and started to feel my hamstrings twitch.

We rode a nice steady pace for the next 5 miles or so, until my legs started to completely, full on cramp.  Quads, adductors, hamstrings, calves and glutes were alternately cramping and relaxing.  At this point, all my illusions about doing a 3:30 were gone, and my 3:45 goal was fading fast.  I couldn't put out decent power, I couldn't push hard, and I could barely stand on the pedals to climb.

We suffered into the third rest stop where I stretched profusely and plowed through a waffle and PB&J, hoping to get some carbs in and just start feeling a little better.  Setting off again, I battled leg cramps intermittently for the rest of the ride, but with 10 miles to go, a quick glance at my timer said that I just might have a chance to make my goal time.  So I went for it.  I hammered for all I was worth, descended without regard for using the brakes, flew around corners and ground my way up each little kicker that we came across.

Tip #6: Use your goals as motivation to fuel your ride.  It just might help you finish strongly.

As we turned onto Sussex Turnpike, I knew there was one last climb to finish, and having a few people on the climb to pick off made it just a bit easier to tolerate the agony going on in my legs.  Two people tried for my wheel and gave up.  I crested the top, saw the green stoplight and gunned it, only to be stopped as it turned red.  I pounded the bars in frustration, knowing that the momentum of that downhill run would have been helpful.  Thankfully Glen pulled up next to me and shouted some encouragement as he took off, smartly dodging to the right of traffic into the cordoned off finish lane.

With 1k to go, I drilled it, watching the timer turn over to 3:44.  I swept around the corner and saw the finish line ahead, merely a blur in my cramp and anaerobic induced tunnel vision.  From 400 meters out I launched whatever sprint I had left, determined to make my 3:45 or die trying.

Finish line medalsFinish time: 3:44:44.  (WKO+ says 3:44:21.)  Goal met.

By the time they picked me up off the fence I was leaning on and removed my time chip, Gerald had rolled in and we all posed with our finishing medals before heading back to the car to clean up, stow the bikes and head back for a little barbecue.  Honestly, my legs were shattered: they had been cramping on and off for about 20 miles, getting progressively worse and now were just stiffened, useless sticks.

But it was worth it.

Once the results came out, I was blown away:

GFNJ Results

6th overall in the climbing competition, out of 367 finishers.  That was well within my top 30 hopes and I was blown away by taking a top 10 position with the horrendous cramps in my legs for half the day.  My wife also managed a 2nd overall out of 99 women, and took the QOM on the first climb, far exceeding her goals.

Next time I'll go over some of the good, the bad and the ugly from a training perspective.

Gran Fondo NJ: Medio Fondo Recap part 1

As you may recall from my earlier post, I've made the Medio Fondo NJ my late season goal.  After a very long season (dating back to December 2011) that included the Rapha Rising Strava Challenge, the Strava Spring Classics Challenge and some personal family issues that kept me off the bike for about 4 weeks, I expected very little other than a festive atmosphere and fun ride with some friends.

Before I go there, let's rewind a bit….and take a look at what I did right, and what I did wrong?

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Medio Fondo NJ (Training)

Just a quick note to everyone who reads this blog:

Gran Fondo NJ is a pretty class act.  If you're at all able, register for it: there's 4 different rides catering to all ability levels of riders along with timed climbs and plenty of festivities the weekend of the ride.

One of the biggest perks is the series of training rides that Marty's Reliable Cycle (the chain of shops that organizes the event) puts on to get riders ready for the routes.  Cue sheets and GPS routes are provided.  Free nutrition is provided.  Rest stops are organized.  There are like minded riders training to be the best they can be on Fondo day.  It's pretty awesome.  Today the Jamis truck was available with test bikes available (for the entire Medio Fondo route to boot.)  Interestingly, they were testing a (blacked out, of course) new 2013 frame before it goes into production.  Unfortunately I wasn't able to get any photos, but it looks quite interesting.

Fixie Don’t Care

Awesome.  Taken from Craigslist, this guy has as much fixie hate as he has creativity.

Failed hipster – fixie must go – $1100 (SLO)

I tried so hard. I dated a girl from Portland. I criticized cheese. I applied the term artisanal to every inanimate object that went in or on my body. I burned and singed my forearms just to make it look like I was going to culinary school. I grew Carol Brady hair. I got itchy from the finest flannel and I cut off circulation from the waist down with jeans that made my ass look like an elevator button…
And I rode a fixie. No more. It's all gotta go.
The hair, the macrame, the texting overages, the Netflix and Hulu Plus. The record collection (have you ever tried to box up and move an effin stack of LPs?!) and the bike. Pictured below is the bike. It's beautiful. It's got red rims. Red chain. Red tires. Red handlebars shaped like devil horns — because it's the devil.

FixieDontCare

The guys at the hipster store don't tell you fixes don't stop. So I will. Fixies don't stop. Stop sign? Fixie don't care. Car coming turning in front of you at a three-way stop? Fixie laugh. Want Chipotle? Nope. Fixie want protein powder/beet/purple carrot/bee pollen juice and won't stop till he gets it. Fixie has a mind of his own.

Yesterday, Fixie got pulled over twice by SLO PD in three hours. In six months time, Fixie collected more tickets than a scalper for a Radiohead show at Hollywood Bowl.

I'm selling this badboy and tipping the dregs of my last PBR tall boy in his memory.

The (Devil) Fixie:
Cinelli Gazzetta Frame (2011)
Crane Creek and Origin 8 components

$1,100 ($1,600 new)

Well played sir, and it proves how silly a fixie really is.
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Cyclops Turbo Trainer: Utter Bastard Machine

This guy on ebay UK not only has a hell of a sense of humor, but he has a serious distaste for his CycleOps Wind Trainer:

I'm selling this bastard thing because i HATE it.  

I’m sure there are people out there who like or even have a perverse love affair with their turbo trainer. It might even attract some sort of love/hate duality. I know for a fact that some people, many of them ostensibly sane with some hideously rapid times to their name, view the turbo as the essential piece of training equipment. Personally, i’d rather rip my face off and dive into a bath of saline solution than use this horrible piece of apparatus. It’s utterly soul-destroying and mind-numbing, which is a pretty vicious combination.

The straw that broke the camel's back:

I thought i might do a ‘quick’ turbo session this evening. The reason being that the weather is pretty terrible and i hadn’t got the time to head down to the lake for the first race of the season. By the time i’d sorted out the rear turbo wheel by putting a tyre on and then pinching an inner tube, then changing the tyre and putting a new tube in, switching the cassette and setting up the bike and then setting up the computer with ‘The Flying Scotsman’ on the iplayer with headphones and subtitles (because of fearsome noise) to alleviate the dreadful and crushing ennui of it all and then got changed and put some water within reach and found my sweaty turbo towel that hasn’t been washed since the last time i dared to ride the bastard (turbo, not turbo towel) and wrestled with the quick release mechanism and then adjusted the height with a series of books under the front wheel by getting on and off about four times then adjusting the saddle height then going back and adjusting the resistance about 6 times with the manual turny thing, i’d wasted about 55 minutes. This was about as long as i intended to spend on the bastard piece of shit.

I managed about 11 minutes at about 70% of max before two things happened. The iplayer began to freeze and unfreeze, robbing me of the only thing that helped me think that i wasn’t actually on the turbo, and then without warning the back wheel leapt out of the dropout clasps and i had to do an emergency unclip and braking manouevre ON THE GODDAMNED TURBO just to stay alive. i suddenly lurched towards the computer where Graeme Obree was riding off the front of some sort of Tour of the Scottish Prettylands in the early part of the film and very nearly ended up joining the crazed circular-breathing scotsman on the silver screen.

If you're made of far stronger stuff than I am, and I'm thinking Ivan Drago in Rocky 4 when he kills Apollo Creed to death – that sort of stronger stuff – and think you can handle the savage bestiality of the CYCLOPS WIND TURBO then please, please, please buy this REPULSIVE ITEM. 

 

Awesome.  Just plain awesome.  Basically, this sums up how I feel about my trainer.